Not Chosen, Just Posin'

I just got a job with a Jewish magazine. I'm not Jewish. They think I am.

Thursday, September 21, 2006

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Being a Catholic, it's practically in my DNA to make the infrequent and shameful confession.*

Here's my most recent: I ventured onto Technorati and typed in my name to see if any results would come up (Hail Mary, Hail Mary, Hail Mary). I was surprised to find quite a few; some good, some bad and some downright idiotic. Mixed somewhere in between this mesh was the following, which was posted on a blog called SFAQ:

Nose Job Gym Class
Okay, I'm a Jew and I loved Not Chosen Just Posin's JAP workout post. I eschewed adding my thoughts to the cacophony of commentary littering his website (also I haven't figured out yet how to comment on someone else's blog). Here's what I would have said though. Four words: Nose Job Gym Class. Many years ago when I was in high school, an apprentice JAP in a small Jewish town on the left bank of Long Island, a traditional rite of passage was the nose job. Structurally fortunate, I did not require one, but I was in the minority (even then). And when the recipients of these nose jobs brought their broken and healed, newly pert, appendages back to high school, they couldn't possibly engage in contact sports. So we had a special gym class for them. I kid you not. I think they did sport knitting or something. I only know I didn't get to do it, I was forced to humiliate myself playing basketball or dodge ball or whatever barbarian activity was underway. Nose Job Gym Class. I haven't thought of that in years.

This is brilliant! Has anyone else heard of Nose Job Gym Classes? Seriously, this could be the cover story for my Jewish tabloid.

I'm having trouble researching it though. Google hasn't heard a thing. In fact:

Your search - "nose job gym class" - did not match any documents.

Feel free to chime in with any related information (If I were really cool, I would add a "helpline" number here: "Have you seen this person? If so, call 1-800-nosejob with any information leading to her whereabouts") Anyway, this is the most hilarious thing I've heard in a while. Thought I'd share.

*As you've probably guessed, or maybe I've mentioned, I don't follow Catholicism. It's a family thing.

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