Not Chosen, Just Posin'

I just got a job with a Jewish magazine. I'm not Jewish. They think I am.


Monday, October 16, 2006


...and other things I should have hidden before having the Silent Designer and the girl with the new British flag-laden mini-cooper over the other night for drinks. (I got to ride in her new car, by the way. People stared at us as if we were 40 clowns getting out of a Hot Wheels-sized car. There were only three of us. I just thought it was cool to not be in a cab or on the subway).

I must be getting too comfortable with my position at the mag because I left out all of my Catholic paraphernalia, so to speak, on Saturday night. I'm not ashamed of my upbringing by any means, but I don't want bad blood between me and my new friends. That's another thing, it's weird that I'm now hanging out with these people and feel that I can't tell them the truth.

While I'm past the point of thinking that I would get fired if people found out I'm not Jewish, I would hate for everyone to feel like they could no longer trust me. I never actually voiced the words "I am Jewish," to anyone (well, except for the publisher during our interview), but I've certainly played along in kind. Blaming my knick-knacks on my roommate and my odd decorating style don't further my case any better either. On that note, I started off with my explanation for the rosary, "it's my roommate's." Next,





...I think they're cool-looking in a Gothic sort of way, I said. It's actually the truth. I do like the way they look and think they're cool, even if they do say things like, "Maria la Milagrosa," which implies the miracle of the immaculate conception. I used to have a dog named "Milagro," I continued. This candle is for her. (This is actually true).


Then there was this:

I didn't say a thing about it, just hoped they didn't see it. It could have been there for a number of reasons. Maybe it's my roommate's or maybe I have it around for research (everyone should know what's in it, right?), but the picture of Jesus? It's a little much. My only out would have been "Jews for Jesus," which might be worse than being Catholic. Is it?

I just thought back to the Shakespearean saying, "The lady doth protest too much, methinks." I didn't want to protest too much. It conveys guilt. I have enough of that as it is. After all, I'm Catholic.

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