There's a guy who works here who I've never mentioned due to the fact that his purpose is yet to be determined. His title is "controller," but he sits in a little windowed room all day and sleeps. Not just a mild sleep, but a snoring one (my contempt for him was certainly heightened these past few days since I couldn't sleep if my life depended on it).
Every now and then he'll walk around and try to strike up conversations, which is pretty annoying considering we're all working.
I'm only giving you this abridged bio so I can tell you what he did this morning. I should add that he instantaneously gained an office-wide stamp of approval for this display:
He brought in a tray of muffins and placed them in the kitchen. He sent out an email to tell everyone they were there, but as the troops were heading in, he told the Publisher's wife....wait for it....."You can't have any because your ass is too big."
She didn't take a muffin.
Let me savor this moment for a minute and I'll return with another story shortly...