Not Chosen, Just Posin'

I just got a job with a Jewish magazine. I'm not Jewish. They think I am.


Friday, November 10, 2006


The Go-To Group of Jewish Friends Web Conference*



Rachel:
You got a book deal? I can't believe it! I have been putting up with this for 26 years and no one has asked me to write about it! Just be cautious of how you put us out there...please...we have gotten enough shit lately.

Me: No, no - no book deal, just an agent. Don't worry, the book's going to be all Jewish love, which I think my site is. On the other hand, some girl asked if it is a "kinder, gentler form of anti-Semitism?" I was pretty annoyed by it, especially because I try to keep my posts more observational than accusatory.

Rachel: I am gonna be serious right now: One thing about the Jewish world is that we are really passionate about where we come from, and sometimes that comes through in overly-sensitive displays. I mean, there is a general opinion that we have this whole funny Woody Allen thing that we radiate, but you have to realize that, deep down, there is really still a terrible thing people still feel to the core. In our communities, we still have people who are living with the nightmare of the Holocaust and that is very real, and we have people who are living with those people....I mean, my boyfriend's mom is a child of survivors, and it paints EVERYTHING she does. You can't leave her house without a bag of just SHIT. She is constantly collecting and handing out crap that was given to her by her mom, out of genuine fear of the Nazis coming back.

I know it sounds ridiculous, but if you think about the fact that there are only 13 million Jews in the world, and what a large percentage of that population has either been a victim of Nazi or Arab terror (or is a direct decendent of either one), then you have a group of people who tend to be a little neurotic. So whereas we can be self-loathing or what have you, some of us have yet to get to the "laughing with us" phase. But the reason that I love your blog so much is that I have worked in the Jewish non-profit a lot, and I think that it is the funniest thing in the WHOLE WORLD. Oh, and you are a genius. You get what is so funny about people on the whole. So don't be upset, know that people have their shit, and that is just reality. Just don't make any penny jokes for awhile, ok?

Me: Whoa. All of that is understood, but I think I'm pretty tame. I can't be accused of or punished for any of this. This is not my fault.

Rachel: If I got too preachy in my last email, I apologize. I just wanted you to understand where the overzealous defensive nature of people like the chick who thought your blog is anti Semetic are coming from.

Me: No apologies necessary; I loved your last message and I'm very aware of where these types of reactions are coming from. Nevertheless, I still get annoyed. On a smaller scale, this type of reaction is the same thing as me getting into a new relationship and having the girl pissed at me and accusing me constantly of cheating just because her last boyfriend did it. Not fair. What's that line? 'I won't be punished for Adam's transgression?' Yeah, something like that.

Rachel: Very true. We Jews have big RELATIONSHIP issues. (Funny, because I was just speaking last night about how eerily similar Bush's reign is to Hitler's...)

But, take that girl's opinion as a compliment...any press is good press, and as you know, only the work of talented people have the possibility of stirring up some kind of controversy.

And there you have it. The series will continue regularly.


*Otherwise known as a chain of emails sent between me and Rachel.

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