Not Chosen, Just Posin'

I just got a job with a Jewish magazine. I'm not Jewish. They think I am.

Monday, February 26, 2007

The Manwhore’s marvelous idea: Attending an Oscar Party.

It seemed like the worst idea of the year until he explained it to me in detail: "It’s like the reverse Superbowl; it’s going to be all chicks!" For this same reason, the Manwhore attends events such as the Vagina Monologues and Lilith Fair. Basically, he’s a genius.

In comparison to the Superbowl, the Oscar Party we attended had a 14:3 girl to guy ratio (yes, we counted). The spread consisted of prosciutto, sliced meats, cheeses, olives, spanakopitas, and caprese salad with pesto instead of fresh basil. For dessert? Ice cream sandwiches, of course. Superbowl with BaconJew and his Iraqi friends had nothing on this. Plus, that was all guys.

The Manwhore pulled one of his favorite moves last night: be the last one to leave and then attempt to hook up with the hostess. Some people might refer to this as stalking. The Manwhore refers to it as, oh hell, I don’t know. It’s stalking no matter what he calls it.

I feel sorry for this girl. She was a nice Jewish girl (coincidence: the Manwhore is also Jewish...or, at least he was last night), wearing a little mini dress and boots, meaning that she was a goner from the onset. At one point during the evening she announced that she had a rash all over her body and that dermatologists couldn't determine what it was. One would think that the Manwhore would be turned off by this. Nope.

Since he stayed longer than I did, I don’t know the outcome. I guess if he walks in later tonight with a full body rash, I can assume his tactics worked for him.

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